Speaking of making an effort…
Go for a blind date
Many people go into a blind date already feeling defeated. Since they’re basically looking to get through it alive, they don’t tend to put in any effort into how they look or the actual date itself. When you’re getting dressed for a date don’t skimp on the little things that will make you stand out to her; it doesn’t matter if you set it up or not. Pick your best dress clothes, your good shoes, and actually style your hair (even if it’s short). Shave right before you go so that you don’t have stubble either. When you show up looking suave it will give off the vibe that you actually care about this date and how it goes. Setting the right tone at the very beginning of the date will keep it going all the way through.
Even if you don’t pick the girl, try to have some say in the location of the date. Your friend might pick out the best little Italian place that they’ve ever been to, but maybe you’re not into that. Ask your friend for this girl’s number and give her a call yourself. Lay out a few options of food and after (or before) activities. She’ll like that you’ve included her in the planning process of the date and it will make it feel more personal than just “meet him here at this time”.
Expect the best
Lift the spirits up with your positive energy
It’s as easy as it sounds. Expect this date to be absolutely the best. Make up some mantras to tell yourself the day before and of the date. Mantras are short phrases that will keep your thoughts positive which will keep your mood positive. Figure out what you really want from this date. If you’re looking for a serious relationship then try something like, “I might be meeting Mrs. Right.” Repeat it ten times in front of the mirror and any time you feel like you might be getting nervous. Let’s say you aren’t quite sure if you want her to be Mrs. Right, but do want something that will go farther than a fling. “We’re going to have a great time and will see each other again.” Sometimes it’s not even the outcome that we fear the most, but what the other person is going to be like. Pick out what you’re worried about (her looks, is she boring, will she be talkative) and make up your own mantra. “She’s not going to be ugly. She will not be boring. We will find something to talk about.” Be careful not to set yourself up for disappointment with your mantra. Telling yourself she’s going to be gorgeous or have long legs will just make you feel worse when you see a short girl with a pock marked face or something.
Don’t believe the hype
Avoiding blind dates just because you’ve heard how awkward they are for everyone involved will only lead you to missing out on good times. Not all blind dates involve sitting there awkwardly eating your meal or discovering that the person you’re sitting with is the opposite of everything you love. Your friends will not hate you if you don’t immediately want to be with this girl forever, but they will be upset if you shoot down everyone they try to hook you up with. Just because you agree to try something new that others talk badly about doesn’t make you a loser. It makes you adventurous. What’s one night out on a date going to cost you? Maybe a dinner, but that’s only if you buy it. She might split the bill with you. What would you lose out on if you stay home instead? Meeting a new person, going out when you normally wouldn’t have been able to, possibly finding a new friend (if not a girlfriend). Trust your friend’s judgment of the both of you, but just make sure to ask them to really think this through before they get the two of you together.
Treat it like you planned it
Put some effort in charming her
The best way to stay positive about this sort of date is to treat it like you planned it out. If you really need to, pretend that you met this girl online (from here) while looking for serious relationships and the two of you hit it off. After a short while you’ve decided to get to know each other even better and have planned a date. In this alternate reality you’d know each other a bit more, but that’s not the important part. The important part is that you feel like you have control over this situation and you’ve made the choices to make it a reality. Feeling like you’ve had a part in this date will make you want to put more effort into all of the different elements. It may even inspire you to bring her flowers or a small token on the first date.
Call her if it worked
Don’t wait for any stupid rule – call her if you like her
Sometimes people don’t follow up on dates. They might be scared that it was just first date luck or think that it’s all in their head and she actually didn’t like it as much as them. Don’t fall for your own mind tricks. You put in the work, you picked the right clothes, you said the right things. Now wait a day or so and give her a call. It doesn’t matter if it’s a blind date or a regular date, letting her know that you enjoyed yourself and want to go out again will only make things better. The second date will have a higher excitement level along with it and you will know her more; meaning you can customize the setting even more. You won’t win them all, though. You might feel like it was a perfect night, but she may not have. It’s true that that does sometimes happen. But if/when it does, don’t let it put you down. One blind date not working out doesn’t mean that they’ll all end the same way. Plenty of people have met and stayed together thanks to their friend’s help in finding their partner.
Sometimes you might worry about…
What happens if you get together and break up later. It’s natural, and does happen. But that’s not why you might worry. Your friends have put the two of you together. That means that you have at least a few mutual friends that would have to pick sides during a break up. Remember: your friends will love you both even if it doesn’t work out. Whether that’s from the first date or a proposal they’ll understand because they’re human. They’ve given you their support, now take it and go on your date.